Please, Be My Friend?

There was a time in my life when I almost begged for myself to be a friend to anybody though I did not literally beg for it. All because I seem to have no best friend, no one to really make me feel I am their friend.

I was more a shrinking violet than a live wire those days. I came to realize early in life that I lack many things compared to my classmates and friends (or maybe more as acquaintances). That could have triggered the introversion, because as far as I can remember, I will choose to be silent and think within, than blurt out my ideas about things because of self-doubt. I rarely speak phrases, only words, in faint voices. Too insecure, or unconfident, I struggled my way up to recognition silently, amidst the hatred of those popular ones who failed to defeat me in what they desired to be for themselves – excellent achiever in school.

I did not do it on purpose. That was my only vehicle to express myself, and to let everybody know that I exist. I felt nobody noticed me until I had put on myself achievements that did not change what I felt a bit. But it somehow introduced me to some who took interest. I made sense after all.

That stage passed. I was able to survive and I learned a lot. It was not necessary to beg for friendship after all. Friendship should be mutual. Both of the parties should feel that they are trusted, appreciated, supported and other requisites that characterize friendship. There should not be a feeling of alienation. There should be acceptance.

I had learned that one should not beg. If one has to put up with the weaknesses of another, that another should also have to put up with one’s weaknesses. If one takes interest befriending another, one must not expect too much that it would be reciprocated. But one should not also ask for morsels, or ‘sit up and ask for food’. It is not necessary. When one gets interested, one should not push around. Friendship is not obligatory.

While it is logically true that friendship takes time to develop, one of the first ingredients, I believe is both of you like and dislike generally the same things. Dissimilarity in tastes mostly puts a barrier between individuals especially when it comes to perspective. How will friendship prosper, for example, between a homebody and a socializer?

“Please, be my friend.” Maybe I would not ask anybody that. But I could be the sincerest friend one’ll ever have and a loyal one at his/her fingertips. To say the least.