A good friend of mine recently ditched his significant other. The connection seemed to have gradually become less binding. The romance seemed to have become more and more dispassionate. That’s how I read the whole account, as this friend is not a kababayan but a foreigner. Honestly, I am not sure how to react with what had happened to him because I do not know him personally, as in person.
What baffles me is my good friend feels this feeling of gratitude now. From the feeling of loneliness and despair comes the overwhelming sense of peace, he said.
I feel sorry that it had to end for the both of them. I always treasure relationships. I am the type who would stick by my beloved no matter what. For me, it would be real pain to be without the one I love. I could always easily part company but not with the people that matters most to me.
But his story is not my story. He must have hurt but was able to face it, including the loss, and the fear, and the life that is ahead (which would probably be DIFFERENT now).
From deep inside, I am hurt for him because he seems to be a very loving father to a son, and a sensible one, too. There could be stories within stories and who am I to criticize anybody on moral grounds? I just have to say that I felt he wanted VERY MUCH to make it work, and it didn’t. So he had to move.
Will it really feel good (at last)? I wish the best FOR HIM...
-----
As I was contemplating about the whole thing, a favorite song was played... by Sade.
By Your Side
You think I'd leave your side baby?
You know me better than that
You think I'd leave down when your down on your knees?
I wouldn't do that
I'll do you right when your wrong
I-----ohhh, ohhh
If only you could see into me
oh, when your cold I'll be there to hold you tight to me
When your on the outside baby and you can't get in
I will show you, your so much better than you know
When your lost, when your alone and you can't get back again
I will find you darling I'll bring you home
If you want to cry
I am here to dry your eyes
and in no time you'll be fine
You think I'd leave your side baby
You know me better than that
You think I'd leave you down when your down on your knees
I wouldn't do that
I'll do you right when your wrong
I-----I, ohhhh, ohhh
If only you could see into me
Oh when your cold
I'll be there
To hold you tight to me
Oh when your alone
I'll be there by your side baby
Hello Mam!
ReplyDeleteLikewise here...I'm quite dissapointed when one relationship doesn't work to provide satisfaction to both parties involve.....
hope they're fine now...
Hi Bing.... you know sometimes things change and when the spark is gone and seemingly diffused forever, it is hard to rekindle it back. But one must try his darnest best to restore a relationship and not simply give up. That's why it is important for us to nurture the relationship, keep the flame burning and ensure that it does not die. In my opinion, it is much better to face the truth rather than fake your way through a relationship.
ReplyDeleteMinsan, hindi ko din maintindihan kung paanong ang dalawang tao na labis ang pagmamahalan ay bigla na lamang manlalamig at tatabangan sa isa't-isa. Ang pag-ibig ay ipinakikipaglaban, ngunit kung isa sa magkapareha ay sumuko na, wala na ring saysay kung ito ay ipagpapatuloy pa.
ReplyDeleteIf he is happy now, maybe then it is the right thing to do. Why would he stick with someone who makes him feel miserable? That's why it's really hard to follow the Lord's teachings esp. on marriage because we all have our differences.
ReplyDeletewhat's the point of going on if the relationship is hellish for the two of them (provided they exhausted all means to save it)? your friend is brave. and if he's a good guy, he'd be happy with another partner soon.
ReplyDeleteHi Bing!
ReplyDeleteWise men often say, "Let go and release all relationships that have run its course."
Sade is great, by the way, I have 3 of her early CDs. Saw her at Radio City Music Hall once. Great concert.
thanks, ka webspy, for dropping by.
ReplyDeletemy friend is ok naman. the last time we had a chat he typed like he was happy. he is free now, as he had described, flex j.
hi, BW... what i read from his 'rants' was there is lack of communication. wonder if that could kill the flame? hmmm... faking a relationship is a much painful story..
hay, naku, rhada, tama ka! wala na nga sigurong saysay pero sa tingin ko he still loves the ex. sabagay, 'those times' cant be forgotten in a snap.. siguro rin hindi na nag work out and things really are becoming awry.
i agree, evi. i just feel sad for him. but as he said, i dont need, too. i was told to be 'happy' for him.
he is a brave man, Nico, and a sensible one, too. just cant disclose his blog which says how he views life. it could not be difficult for him to find another, i suppose, because he has comely features.
that's a good adage, senor enrique! very nice to remember. oh, and about sage, she is PERFECT!
thanks, ka webspy, for dropping by.
ReplyDeletemy friend is ok naman. the last time we had a chat he typed like he was happy. he is free now, as he had described, flex j.
hi, BW... what i read from his 'rants' was there is lack of communication. wonder if that could kill the flame? hmmm... faking a relationship is a much painful story..
hay, naku, rhada, tama ka! wala na nga sigurong saysay pero sa tingin ko he still loves the ex. sabagay, 'those times' cant be forgotten in a snap.. siguro rin hindi na nag work out and things really are becoming awry.
i agree, evi. i just feel sad for him. but as he said, i dont need, too. i was told to be 'happy' for him.
he is a brave man, Nico, and a sensible one, too. just cant disclose his blog which says how he views life. it could not be difficult for him to find another, i suppose, because he has comely features.
that's a good adage, senor enrique! very nice to remember. oh, and about sage, she is PERFECT!
C'est la vie
ReplyDeleteyea, Sam, though harsh one must accept it. that's life!
ReplyDeleteyea, Sam, though harsh one must accept it. that's life!
ReplyDeleteBing, it is surprising to know that lack of communication is the primary reason for marriage break-ups. I've seen couples married for a long time and break up esp when kids become older and more independent. The reason is the marriage existed for the sake of the kids and not for themsleves. Others are reluctant to air out their beef to their partner and prefer to endure the pain. If marriage is important, isn't it worth fighting for?
ReplyDeleteI know someone who stayed with her husband and kids for 17 years, finally left. She told people that her husband was a lousy communicator
and one month after their marriage she wanted out but hung on because she had to. We believe her because even during their legal separation process, they couldn't even agree on anything!
Breakup stories always make me sad. But then again, it's hard to tell what really happened between them. Maybe it's all for the best.
ReplyDeleteLike you, I treasure my husband and our marriage. It's for keeps.
that's what we had learned to develop, BW, to communicate about anything. it is a vital factor why there are separations or divorce - the lack of communication. but sometimes when a couple overdo it, the tendency to 'overcommunicate' could endanger the relation, too.
ReplyDeletehi, ruff,! it is a really, really nice song. it could romanticize a dying relationship.
makes me sad, too, jayred... especially when you feel that the other party still wants to remain and continue. on the other hand, i think it would be better for them to part ways than the other suffering or bearing the pain but not really feeling happy.
that's what we had learned to develop, BW, to communicate about anything. it is a vital factor why there are separations or divorce - the lack of communication. but sometimes when a couple overdo it, the tendency to 'overcommunicate' could endanger the relation, too.
ReplyDeletehi, ruff,! it is a really, really nice song. it could romanticize a dying relationship.
makes me sad, too, jayred... especially when you feel that the other party still wants to remain and continue. on the other hand, i think it would be better for them to part ways than the other suffering or bearing the pain but not really feeling happy.