Do you have to expect a gift when you give one? Gifts are things bestowed to give pleasure or to show gratitude. One cannot expect that the ‘donee’ feels the same toward the ‘donor’.
I give gifts because a person holds an important place in my heart. In whatever form, gifts to me are symbols of friendship, fondness, and in some instances necessities to an occasion. I give gifts to tell someone that “I love you”, “I like you”, “I remember you” or “You are important to me” albeit indirectly. I do not expect anything in return.
Gifts are bonds, links or bridges. They should not be belittled nor taken for granted. It is not important if they cost little, or if they are not something I expect. It is the thought that counts. But it is an obvious fact that there are gifts I like very much – those that respond to a need at the moment, or those that resolve want of something. For example, a book given to me in a particular occasion answers my voracious need of something that is worth reading.
An officemate gave me a gift which she left on my table while I was not in my room. I sent a text message of thanks not mentioning that I will reciprocate her deed by giving a gift. I don’t really plan to give her anyway for some reasons. She did not reply but I saw her when I went down to the office where she is and thank her simply for the gift. The reply was a trite, “Haaa?” (Can you guess now why I don’t like to give her a gift?) But being pressured with that remark and a preceding text message from her that goes “Lord, bless this person, bait po ‘yan at feel ko siya ang unang-unang magreregalo sa akin ngayong Pasko”, I gave her a gift.
It is so easy to get a gift for a friend but for me, I don’t want a gift because I asked someone to give me a gift. It is not something given because someone was pressured or was forced. It must be coming from the heart, given with free will.
Then I gave her the gift with the wishy-washy, “O, Merry Christmas!” Not a ‘Thank you” followed. I was not expecting the ‘thank you’ but I was expecting that she would deny me that because of disappointment. Her gift was pricey than what I gave her.
I give gifts because a person holds an important place in my heart. In whatever form, gifts to me are symbols of friendship, fondness, and in some instances necessities to an occasion. I give gifts to tell someone that “I love you”, “I like you”, “I remember you” or “You are important to me” albeit indirectly. I do not expect anything in return.
Gifts are bonds, links or bridges. They should not be belittled nor taken for granted. It is not important if they cost little, or if they are not something I expect. It is the thought that counts. But it is an obvious fact that there are gifts I like very much – those that respond to a need at the moment, or those that resolve want of something. For example, a book given to me in a particular occasion answers my voracious need of something that is worth reading.
An officemate gave me a gift which she left on my table while I was not in my room. I sent a text message of thanks not mentioning that I will reciprocate her deed by giving a gift. I don’t really plan to give her anyway for some reasons. She did not reply but I saw her when I went down to the office where she is and thank her simply for the gift. The reply was a trite, “Haaa?” (Can you guess now why I don’t like to give her a gift?) But being pressured with that remark and a preceding text message from her that goes “Lord, bless this person, bait po ‘yan at feel ko siya ang unang-unang magreregalo sa akin ngayong Pasko”, I gave her a gift.
It is so easy to get a gift for a friend but for me, I don’t want a gift because I asked someone to give me a gift. It is not something given because someone was pressured or was forced. It must be coming from the heart, given with free will.
Then I gave her the gift with the wishy-washy, “O, Merry Christmas!” Not a ‘Thank you” followed. I was not expecting the ‘thank you’ but I was expecting that she would deny me that because of disappointment. Her gift was pricey than what I gave her.
Problem with some people is that they take the "Give and you shall recieve" thing too seriously....Really pathetic. :-(
ReplyDeleteha ha yes... and it disappointments me really!
ReplyDeletehow was your Christmas, snglguy?
bait mo nga at binigyan mo pa sya ng regalo eh.
ReplyDeleteei, Nico! di ako mabait pag nagagalit... i have my intentions doing that he he kaya lang baka di pa rin tinablan.
ReplyDeleteI suppose that there are people like so, Bing.
ReplyDeleteIt's the thought that counts does not work for me. I'm not such a noble person, but I'd rather not be thought of than be gifted by someone I know with a cheap piece of nothing or something that's really not of me.
I believe it's better not to give anything than to give something, just so one can say, I remembered. For me, a sincere greeting is enough. Sometimes, people just forget. It happens.
I know a person who married into millions. She always wanted to exchange gifts on Christmas day. After a couple of years of this, her intentions became clear. She would give expensive gifts to those who kiss her ass and cheap crap to those that don't. Mean time, everyone gave the best they could. She uses the occasion to show her displeasure, thinking her millions promoted her into some kind of queen. Something of a scrooge, I'd say. Anyway, I tell you, she has a Merry Christmas!
That's what she thinks, anyway.
Happy New Year!