Sunday, June 11, 2006

Suspicious Wife

Just the other day, on my way home, I saw a male friend in the act of running off, too. I asked first where his route is and if I can be given a lift up the corner of the main road. He forced an alibi that he will have to stay a little later. Puzzled by the answer, I opted to leave immediately and boarded a jeep.


I was so puzzled that I even asked Papsie what could be the possible reason why my friend reacted that way. Just the other day with a co-employee, I was in that vehicle. Still wondering, I asked another friend if my male friend's wife is a jealous type. She confirmed and said that everyday his wife is waiting at the corner of that main road. She also said that my male friend could have deliberately avoided the chance of giving me a lift. But I insisted why the other fellow girl employee was allowed. And my friend told me that perhaps because she was a close friend of the wife, and a business partner, too. That's it? And if I will be their business partner, I can be given a lift? Really odd.


I also experience, although I don't know how natural it is, pangs of jealousy. I usually feel jealous when Papsie's attention is caught by a pretty woman passing by, and gets lost in the conversation. But I don't get hysterical and start an argument. I would usually be silent and not utter a word anymore. Yes, not a word, even if he pesters me why I suddenly do not answer or become silent in the middle of it all. I discuss the things indirectly when I feel it is the right time, starting from hints to direct assault. :-( What I cannot understand is why I get the puzzled look always from Papsie when I suddenly become silent. It is as if he is not guilty of anything. Now, I may have overcome the feeling. That is maybe I have already matured (?) to understand that he is not leaving me when he stares at a pretty woman passing by. ;-)


Out of the blue a thought surfaced! Maybe there are tests to assess jealousy and true enough there is a jealousy test for women, and for men, too.


I got a 34 and it means this. Couldn't agree more.




Most people experience a certain amount of fear that their loved one could leave them for someone else. After all, these things happen, and when they do, it is usually very painful. You fit right into this usual range - certain situations may spark feelings of jealousy, but generally you are not preoccupied with the fear of losing your partner. If you were honest with yourself while taking the test, this means that you are secure, strong, independent and rational enough to recognize the possibility of losing your partner to someone else, but not be consumed by it. That does not mean that you do not care; you would certainly be as sad or crushed as anybody else. However, you know that if it ever happens, you will survive with your self-esteem and dignity intact. You realize that even though you might love your partner very much, s/he is not the only fish in the sea, and that you would eventually find happiness with someone else. Such feelings give you a sense of security and the strength to trust, and allow you to be comfortable in the relationship. That, in turn, boosts the chances of a lasting and fulfilling relationship.


20 comments:

  1. did the test, got a 24... not really a green-eued monster...

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  2. I got a 28. I think we are pretty much in the same range because it gave me the same meaning as yours. And mine is also true. I'm not preoccupied with the fear of losing my partner.

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  3. Ahhh jealousy, how many people have been killed/murdered because of that green-eyed monster. Remember Cain and Abel?

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  4. hm..we're in the same range. got a 39 ;)

    btw, i thought that maybe you'd like to read my independence day entry at crimson crux, if you have the time. there, i share a burmese priest's passionate belief in the filipino people. if a foreigner can believe in us, why can't we?

    thanks, tita bing. happy independence day!

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  5. hi, yuri! i think you're not. that's pretty low. :-P

    yes, niceheart. not that i dont love and I dont care at all.. i think i have this mindset that if a lover doesnt love me anymore, i would not insist.

    am jealous at times, single but wont kill because i got jealous ha ha

    happy independence day, too, corsi! the article is nicely done. :-)

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  6. Why the other girl was given a lift and you were not? Simple. You're much much more beautiful and the wife is a jealous type. Hehe.

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  7. tito Papsie... such a fortunate guy!

    I totally agree with abaniko.


    belated maligayang araw ng kalayaan!

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  8. ha ha i dont regard myself as much much more beautiful, nico...really, fortunate siya, ha... belated maligayang araw ng kalayaan rin, din din!

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  9. I got also 28. It's not that I have no fear of losing him, I just trust him I think.

    Have a nice day tita Bing!

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  10. Okay yan Ate Bing ah. Ma try nga :)

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  11. hi, ann.. pareho kayo ni irene, so halos pareho pala tayo.

    jairam, tell me what you got, ha?

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  12. I got 23. :) The only other woman Honey ever shows any interest in is Maria Sharapova... but don't all men do? :) I just make sure I side with her opponent whenever we watch her on TV.

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  13. hi ate bing! i believe the green-eyed monster could only get us if we want it to!

    when my boyfriend and i were just starting out, both of us easily got jealous, even over simple issues. after 6 years, our relationship is stronger than ever, and i don't see any green-eyed monster lurking anywhere anymore!

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  14. it is normal for men to see or i mean be aware whenever a beautiful lady is around.. but that doesnt mean he's unfaithful... beauty is to be appreciated... and it is wrong to nag nor it is to sulk and shut up and stop the conversation when this happens... anyway, girls do the same... i know 'cause i have three stupid sisters...

    we, men, i think, have innate satelites in our heads that alarms us whenever a pretty lady is detected within proximity... and our reflexes unvoluntarily points us to the exact location... hmmm...

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  15. ah... the new heart throb of the tennis court. Papsie admires her, too. even my kids like her. beautiful indeed, toe.

    ei, vina... nice to read you. i guess the length of the relationship strengthens each of the couple. 'tis but normal to feel that way, i think, when the relationship is new. thanks for dropping by. :-)

    monmon, such harsh words naman for your sisters... nagging is a no-no, i think, it would just aggravate the situation. for me, better to be silent and contemplate than resort to nagging or nasty arguments.

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  16. we men are visual creatures. we appreciate what we see, as long as the most we look but not stare or covet.

    it can be considered a weakness or simply our nature.

    good that you've overcome the feeling.

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  17. i agree, men are visual creatures. there's a big difference though between looking and staring, di ba?

    it is men's nature, beatburn.

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  18. bingske... ganun din yun.. ang silent treatment is worse than a really really loud nagging...

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  19. I am at this point the least concern of being jealous about my hubby getting into mischief not to say that I have not been some point in my life (20 plus). I suppose it takes a lot of experience how to turn jealousy into something positive. I’ve written about “Husbands who likes to look at other women” and what to do about it just few days ago.

    I love my hubby dearly. He is not perfect but close to being the ideal man for all seasons. He tends to be cranky at times. I suppose the younger “we” at home excuse him during the sporadic stage of men-0h-pause moods. Of course between him and me, we take turns hahaha.

    But because of our age difference, the idea of death is inevitable. Although I have been preparing myself how to overcome death do us part, I am not exactly sure how courageous am I to handle the lost when it happens. We’ve discuss about this matter. He said, “Re-marry a.s.a.p.”

    I said, “What! You are asking me to find a nail to hammer my head? Besides, I’ll loose all my benefits. Blah…blah…blah…” The next chapter of life is a blank page for now. ;)

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  20. Papsie also tells me that, monmon...

    will check that out, CLAIQMS! perhaps i'll get some tips that i have not learned yet. :-P i also think that it's like a big rock pounded on the head - remarrying, or am i just being so negative :-)

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