Monday, April 25, 2005

When the Going Gets Tough

What would you do when the turn of events did not work as expected? And people are relying on you?

My initial reaction most of the time is to panic silently. Then I shut myself off from the world and ponder alone. The trouble with me is I cannot concentrate with noise around and be able to come up with a solution if people are buzzing endlessly. I face the problem squarely in a room, in a comfort room, in an aisle, or wherever there is silence.

They say two heads are better than one, even during moments of jam. It only works for me with Papsie’s presence. He is the only person who gives me that assurance that everything will be fine – even without the words. He is truly a dependable husband, son, brother, and friend in spite of his disability. You see, my husband is a stroke victim, paralyzing the left part of his body. But despite the ill-health condition, he treats life with a sunny disposition. Perhaps that is where I get the strength and not be enervated from the difficult situations we encounter. I pride myself of having a husband like him. Second from God, who always braces me with His words, Papsie never leave me during difficult situations.

Without Papsie by my side, during situations where he cannot be there to help, I settle an issue alone, from deep thinking, talking to myself, within the confines of a room, or a place that could provide the silence that I need. I would emerge calm, firm, but open-minded. I am very slow to react in the course of circumstances, though panicky inside, and would react accordingly after mulling things over.

Others would definitely ask what if the situation requires an immediate resolution. That would depend on the gravity of a situation and that is where my weakness comes in, I am at the mercy of the situation and of people who likes to take advantage of it. Mostly that would be those situations where my decision would be influenced or swayed. And those are moments I would wish that Papsie is there.

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